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Greetings to All - and excuse this musing .

Today , 04APRIL2011.....I am 71 years , and in proper celebration I baked up a modest pan of hashish brownies . Before I continue  , let me add quickly that I cancelled the work contract with my employer .

I have been feeling a bit peevish , no appetite to speak of really . No energy only lethargy , difficult for the thriving adventure sort as myself .

I started smoking Dunhills at 12 . Swiping a few here and there from an Uncle that put on airs . Again , I am 71 and
 they have caught up with me . As I knew  they eventually would , and it's of no matter . The physician specialist confirmed  everything . Death as given the odd wave towards me over a life of mayhem . As a matter of course Death has ridden by my side .
Gruesome , perhaps not . A full life of an adrenalin obsessed warrior/adventurer can bring Him "up close and
personal ."

But I write of Life today, the rich Life I was gifted . The short on planet experience of a true coward . Born afraid of my shadow ...just bloody afriad . Being a puny midget did not advance my form one iota either . Fortunately , in the long run , I was thrown to the wolves and survived , eventually to become the leader of a large and powerful Pack . My Fear at all times choking the back of my throat , a phlegm of terror . My fear telling me to run and hide fool . I learned to turn my fear on myself by recognizing it and pursuing the object I was so afraid of . Scared and peeing my drawers - cleaned myself up and embraced Life , feeding off of the fear , looking for a new challenge to master . . I drone on for one reason , if you , the reader are secure in your sheltered cubicle then don't listen . However you the reader are on My Coolworks and therefore must a dream or dreams . All I say is a simple message from my old heart .
Go Now  , Go Soon , forget the 5 page bloody packing list and GO ! Whatever it takes .....truly don't put it off , don't say "next year perhaps "  . Millions of old dead cellls in your body are removed and discarded every second , new cells are formed every second with new energy and potential . Grasp and hold , reach out to your new self and Go with your Dream .

Dreams - mine have been realized over and again . I am the luckiest man still alive , and would not change a single moment or memory .Blessed I have been to live and reap the grand rewards of imagination and discovery .

Only one more item . Upon Discharge from Her Majesty's Service , I retired to my childhood home , due largely to an inheritance . Most all the blokes I caroused with as a lad  have never left . We share a pint and lies at the Old Bridge Pub . All I will say is that the lies told after a pint and small life are rather dull , no matter the speaker's talent . Go , GO - come back to your home place with good stories to keep the fearful and sedentary entertained .

I sign off and prepare to meet my old mates and family . A blessed life . Shouldn't think I will be returning often , but I have so enjoyed the crowd on this website . . . . Go - Security is where you make it - through new friends and experiences . Love is everywhere only waiting in the floatsom of  modern life . Go , jump -you may fall and be hurt or prosper . If you don't jump how will you know ? I am preparing for the final leap , scared , yes . Oh but what a leap of discovery I am soon to embark . Do hope the brownies assist with my flagging appetite . I certainly do not want my old mates to see me laid out looking like a stiff !
Good -by , Godspeed and GO .

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Comment by Terry Lynne Meyer on April 12, 2011 at 11:36am
Hello youre blog impowers me, A close freind of mine died and came back to 3 times in 8 hours! . He says death is for the living. Peace and love
Comment by Carol on April 12, 2011 at 8:27am

Having never been in a true Pissing contest, I can only imagine.

Does speed, distance and quantity come into play? Style, comportment ? Humm, wondering.

Enjoying the banter, the introspection, and comments.

Please continue, Sergeant Major.


Comment by bonsi mcgraw on April 12, 2011 at 7:39am
Greetings once again Sergeant Major . I can not state how much this blog has affected my being . I have read your musing  several times and have saved  as well .  You words and spirit will live on Sir .
Comment by Polident/Divet/Scarface on April 11, 2011 at 3:34pm
JP is clueless as to the essence of real music .

We have realized that we were part of the Multinational Force in Beirut . There is a camaraderie with a fellow that shared the terror of combat in the dark alleys and ruined walls of a once regal city .

A not on JPH ( HA ! ) : one child , no grandchildren . Could not carry a tune in a bucket , ever . Pissing contest failure . A few hundred para jumps . Common ego of the USMarines . . .Decorated . Foreign Aid manager . World Vagabond . Craftsman in wood . Has trouble enunciating , due to unfortunate lip projection . Did I mention the EGO and Singing issues ? Trust this mate with my life if I were to live . Rather Ugly , did I mention the facial tic and bedwetting confession . There , that will suffice .

I feel like a young lad today , well , a fine 55 rather .
Comment by JPH on April 11, 2011 at 9:55am
Well PDS and I have Skyped and kissed / madeup . We had a great time telling bigger lies to eachother and I feel we will be in touch daily . The accordion solo was impressive but LONGGGG .
Comment by Carol on April 9, 2011 at 8:48am

Amazing blog, Polident, and your personal history a reminder that one should respect and honor each person we meet . We never truely know what heroes walk among us because they seldom talk about it.

Thanks JPH.



Comment by JPH on April 7, 2011 at 9:15am
My apologies . You're right , none of my business
Comment by Polident/Divet/Scarface on April 7, 2011 at 8:24am

Thank All of You for your comments . It appears as though JPH never cleared Security . No matter .

The journey ahead , I am about to be Dead . I am petrified . The pictures of Death are frightening . The handbooks are very subjective ( Bible , Quoran , etc ) and I feel are  antiquated . This is the premier journey but there is a noted absence of relevant information . For instance , the timetable of departure is ambiguous . Yesterday , I begged to be taken immediately . This evening I am chipper , with a bit of color , a stroll to the pub may be ahead ... How to prepare ? I revert to my old standard - take on the challenge with vigor . Therefore the practical arrangements are complete . I have ordered cremation . Scatter the ashes in the garden . I see no real glory in tying up a sliver of our precious Earth in order to store a bit of tissue .
My real questions . Will the pain be gone ? Do I see my dear Mum ? And what of my mates ? Will our bodies be torn and abused , or will we be whole ? If I am whole , then the pain must be gone . Oh so many questions .

I am petrified . I have prepared as much as possible in order to free my mind for the present . Living Here Now  . The journey of light will come . My affairs are arranged and all the wags at the pub are lining up for pints at the wake .

I am petrified . of height . Walking out of a perfectly stable in flight craft is an outrageous example of stupidity .

I am puny , the frame of an underfed pullet . The big lads did enjoy a toss now and again . I do admit a joy as I toss the big lads . Judo created equality among the brawny . 

I absolutely deplore spiders and snakes . I became an Instructor at the jungle warfare school . 

I say all not to be a braggart . I say all as a message . The real great fear of life , is death, because it is unknown unseen . All other fear can be overcome or dealt with .
I'll not visit again . This site is about the future . I am a part of the past .

Oh yes , the drugs . The hashish brownies are splendid and helped so much with my appetite . Although a biscuit at tea is more preferable .

And yes ......Go Now - Tomorrow May Never Arrive .

Goodbye All , please delete as needed .

Comment by Billie Brown on April 6, 2011 at 11:13am
JP I want to thank you very much for giving us more insight into Polident.  I had talked to him just little and was ready to meet him & be friends in Glacier.  That will be my loss.  Absolutely loved your letter to him, I can tell y'all were cut from the same cloth.  And yes he will save you a spot!
Comment by bonsi mcgraw on April 6, 2011 at 11:06am
JP - realize that readers may not understand that your lack of empathy is in fact a statement of how Warriors show compassion . Somewhat like - "if you die 1st - we get to split your gear ." many do not comprehend

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