Living & Working in Great Places
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For all you Old Testament buffs I thought it might be fun to compare my current experience in Alaska with the 10 plagues of Egypt :-) First, we would turn the Nanana River red as blood however it's frozen solid! Maybe we could conjure up a cherry icee rendition? Next we have this incessant snow....please make it just hail fire for a few minutes....Please. And what the f__k with the 16 deg temps? It's really bad when you start layering your long underwear! OK......eventually we will thaw out and then, guess what, we get to experience something called "breakup". Now, I'm not referring to your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend folks. Think of a pig sty .... now think of something dirtier. Got it? Yep, that's breakup. Mud everywhere. It's when my white truck becomes a brown truck (for 2 months). It's when you have clean clothes one day, and are literally covered in this muddy goo the next. It's where every house has a literal shoe store on their front porch because no one dares wears their muddy, God-forsaken shoes inside the house! You get the picture. Now while all this is going on the mosquitoes are having the best sex of their lives in all those mud puddles. In about a month all those baby mosquitoes grow up to be bat sized blood suckers just looking for Alaska newbies who forgot to spray themselves.....Dinner Time! This is when you begin to feel faint from blood loss walking from the cabin to the bus stop. Some of the smaller girl Rangers will likely be carried away by these blood-suckers never to be seen again! So let's say you get through the Ice, snow, mud and mosquitoes.....now all the grizzlies are out. And boy are they famished! (it was a LONG winter) Man, some fresh MEAT sure would taste good wouldn't it....oh look there's some guy/girl in a goofy Ranger uniform.....yep, Dinner Time :-) Have I reached 10 yet? I've lost count. Oh, did I mention the 800 pound Moose that would just as well run over you as look at you? or the Wolf Packs? Welcome to Alaska 2013. Ranger Rich